After breakfast Garry and Des went to town in our Land Rover to sort out police formalities and buy insurance. Us scrubbers set about washing in a huge cast iron bowl - it is such hard work getting clothes clean as they get so filthy and cold water isn’t really effective. Anyway, I had just finished and an African girl accidentally tipped the whole lot into the sand!

Even under the shade of the canopy, the heat was unbearable so I had a shower and could have stayed there all day. The clothes were dry within an hour and we had a laugh with two jolly African girls who showed us how to tie a wrap shirt properly and the way they put their head scarves on. They then dragged Jackie off to their house on the campsite to look at their work in the mirror.

When the boys returned they came back with cold beers and fresh tomatoes. What a treat to have fresh vegetables after so long. We celebrated by having a lovely 3 course meal - Asparagus soup, mash corned beet and tomato salad, followed by figs and custard. Finished off with a white table cloth and half of mug of wine each. We were joined for dinner by our bouroron lad called Barti, as we had offered him a lift to Agadez, half way through his starter though he left and as his French was not very good we didn’t know why. We also met up with a New Zealand hitchhiker that we spent the evening with in Tammanrassed.

After collecting our passports from the police, we sent off to Agadez, we didn’t get very far when Des’ Land Rover was very hot so we pulled off the tarmac road and they took the thermostat out in a very strong wind. The sand stung their legs and faces but it wasn’t long before we were on the road again. We stopped for an early lunch to cool the engine down and stayed in the protection of the Land Rover. We were stopped for a police check and although they looked unhappy, we understood why - they were sat under a straw canopy staring at the road all day. Des and Jackie gave Barti a lift and once we were through the police check we dropped him off by some straw huts, agreed in sign language to meet him later. We tried to find a place to change travellers’ cheques but had no success as it was Saturday, so we were confined to stay in the hotel car park. (For £3.50 per night).

It was fun getting to the hotel in one piece and away from all the hawkers. I had a little girl put a piece of cloth on my head that she tried to sell as a scarf. When in the bar, Barti bought his friend in who spoke very good English; Cede had been to university to study English and African culture. They invited us to Barti’s hut to meet his family for tea. As we approached we had a herd of interested children to shake hands with. His hut was made from sticks bent into a dome then covered with woven straw mats. There was no light so we asked if we could get our gas light. There were mats on the floor but they laid down blankets for us. We were very honoured to meet his parents, one of his 3 wives (the other 2 apparently have their own huts), his baby son and his sister with baby.

There were a couple of other interested villages who kept popping in. Outside was alive with music and merriment, apparently a festival. A young boy got a small basket of coal to heat up the tiny teapot that would be filled with sweet mind tea, poured from at least 2 feet and then back in the pot and repeated. Before the tea we were given a large hollowed out vegetable (Ralabush) filled with water to drink. Then we were offered millet and water, which they apparently eat for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I felt so sad as they were used to eating the cattle they herded. It was awful - just like flour and water glue.

The tea was served in tiny glasses that we passed around ourselves. They themselves had nothing and sat fascinated and highly amused. The girls plaited our hair, one while her baby was feeding. Jackie gave out little toys to the children and then put eye ointment in a girls and baby’s eyes. As we were about to leave they showed us the wares they had for sale, which made us ?????? of their situation - forced into this existence. We had no cash, so after apologising and bidding farewell we were mauled by the children to give cadeaux, as we returned to the car. The whole day had been too much to absorb and all feeling depressed and tetchy we declined dinner in the restaurant and instead met 3 Nigerians and talked for hours about the problems of Africa.

Spent the day in total seclusion in the car park. Garry gave Rover and oil change while Des tried to repair their brakes. I did very little as it was so hot. Garry had adapted much better to the heat than feeble old me. The hotel is opposite the famous mosque. A tall column made of red clay with wood protruding from each side for support.

After a very hot night, I showered as soon as I got up and as soon as I was finished felt just as hot. We all went for breakfast in the hotel and sat on the roof terrace but it was very windy and the sand in the air made visibility minimal. That put paid to the days tour around the air mountains. Even more so, when we realised the whole auxiliary battery system wasn’t working. It took Garry and Des a good 2 hours, swearing and panicking to find out what was wrong - I was having difficulty just living in the heat, so I should think they were really suffering.

We starting talking to some Dutch people and when we realised one was a nurse we asked advice on what we should do with Garry’s mouth ulcers, which after getting bigger and bigger in a week and daily treatment of iodine and salt water was worrying us, she advised neat TCP.

We left Agadez at about 4 and unfortunately missed Cede and Barti to say goodbye and give presents.

Drove on a good asphalt road till about 6.30 and pulled off the road behind the rubber plant type trees. All around us was really dry and we wondered if this was because its just before the rainy season or the effects of the encroaching Sahel. Everyone exhausted with the heat we went to bed at 8.30.

We awoke to hear Jackie and Des fighting off vendors. It was incredibly hot and I felt quite ill. We were entertained by our new friends, Hassan, a 7 year old local who speaks English and is very kind. His mate was the harmless village idiot who was lanky and had an amazing smile with Beaucoup de Teeth. He didn’t stop laughing the whole day and when we gave him some magnets he proceeded to try to eat them, then spent the next hour in hysterics over it. Hassan and smiley took us to the market and he helped us buy our provisions at a good price, we were only gone for an hour but we were melting by the time we returned. We showered and then sat in the shade most of the afternoon, lazily watching the big lizards. In the meantime, 2 guys appeared, who we thought were trying to sell to us but turned out they had found Garry’s wallet in the shower!

They hadn’t taken any money and we gladly rewarded them with 500 CFA. Our esteem for these people rose instantly. We gave Hassan and Smiley some nougat and caused a stir as everyone else who arrived to sell to us wanted to share it. We gave Hassan a lift to the petrol station and his face was a picture all the way there.

We only drove out of town for about 1 hour as it was starting to get dark. The small straw hut villages are getting closer together, so its hard to find somewhere private to camp. We eventually pulled off the road behind some low trees. During dinner a huge white spider ran over my feet and I ran a mile and after that we were extremely cautious!

During breakfast, 6 boys, 2 on donkeys, arrived and immediately started asking for cadeaux. They were getting closer and closer to us until in the end they were following in our footsteps. We ended up making a hasty retreat as it was much too early to be hassled.

We had a nice drive through open savannah and many settlements. The roads throughout Niger have been excellent tarmac and as the soil looked richer we felt happier about the quality of these people’s lives.

Stopped for lunch in a small dip and the heat was unbearable - it seems far better to drive with the windows open than to stop in this heat. Things are getting more tense with our travelling companions, as they never want the same as us - but don’t like to make any decisions. We really can’t understand why they are doing such a trip except to show off about it, when they get home.

We found a track that led into thick shrub land. We walked quite a way into the undergrowth to see where it let, but never did find out where it led to, so drove into the trees and camped there. It was a beautiful spot and we felt like we were really in the depths of Africa.

As we were having breakfast we saw a small herd of goats through the trees, then a man appeared and squatted near us. He couldn’t speak french so we could only communicate with sign language. We gave him some cigs and Jackie gave him peanuts and for the first time in Africa, he gave us something in return - 3 mangoes. He only had 5 on him and we guessed it was his lunch.

We were trying to find out what animals lived in the area so Jackie showed him some pictures of African animals and he went into hysterics over every one. His laugh was so infectious that we were creased up with giggles.

On arriving at the outskirts of Niamay, there was a police check and they took some paracetemol and paludrine!  Niamay is the capital on the banks of the river Niger. Its very modern with some spaceage buildings that sickened me, to think of the money that could have gone to the people.

We had an harassing afternoon in the Post Office, finding a bank and finding out about a visa for Burkinos Fasso. I tried to ring Dad and he wasn’t in his office! It cost £8 to find out.

Found a nice campsite with ??? of trees and bumped into the New Zealander hitchhiker for the fourth time. After showering it was still so hot that we contemplated sleeping outside, but there were far too many ants about, so we decided to sleep with the doors open.

After a sleepless night, being woken up by the growling of the campsite stray dogs and dripping with heat, got up early as it was too hot to sleep. We went to the French consulate to get our visas for Burkinos Fasso and was pleasantly surprised to be given them within ½ hour. The embassy was incredibly cool and very efficiently run by the French.

From there we went to the supermarket that was an Aladdin’s cave of goodies. We bought fresh mince, cheese, various unobtainable tins and managed to spend £26 on 2 small boxes of food.

When we had showered, we set off to Park de Ur, the National Park, but upon leaving the town the police check wouldn’t let us go through, until we got our passports stamped by the Surite.

Back to town, across the Niger river, where there was all sorts of activity, people swimming and bathing, animals grazing and bathing. As we were trying to find the Surite we were stopped by a policeman and charged with not indicating!. This meant that he confiscated Garry’s licence until he went to the police to pay the fine of £8. He had problems with Jackie, when we eventually found the police as she threw a tantrum at them when all they wanted to do was let us wait in the cool of their office. They were actually very friendly considering we have woken them up and as it was Saturday were officially closed until Monday. It turned out that if we went to the game reserve we would have to repeat the above formalities so decided to leave Niger behind us and head for Burkinos Fasso. Had fun and games trying to find camp but it turned out that we found a beautiful spot with authentic jungle noises.

Had a game of scrabble with the bones, but it really is getting intolerable.

Set off fairly late and poodled along, stopping at intervals for the royals to catch us up.

We lost them for a while and it turned out that Jackie went into a village to buy bread while Des was being hassled by blind beggars. Stopped for lunch in a dried river bed and Garry and I went to explore the huge termite hills.

At about 3 Des and Jackie needed to fill us with water so we stopped in Fada Ngourma where a bar gave them a jerry can full and we had a beer with 2 Dutch people, the man was a field worker in Ouaga and his sister had come to visit. Jackie did her utmost to impress and they left within ½ hour. Then she gave a boy a new tee-shirt in payment for showing them where to buy bread and therefore setting presidence for pay. Our car guardian looked most offended when we gave him money and a biro as payment.

Set off a little further up the road and pulled off to camp and came face to face with a farmer. He cheerfully agreed that we could camp there for the night and we then realised we would have a welcoming committee at first light the next day. That night a strong wind whipped up and there was lightning in the distance. We watched with baited breath as some of the farmers fires grew quite ferocious but dropped as quickly again.

Sure enough the farmer was there looking down on us as we opened our eyes. He bought along a village elder, several children and later we were joined by his wife. They spoke no French and didn’t ask for anything, so we carried on with breakfast enlightening them into the art of bed folding and other such British traditions. Garry gave the elder some tea and sugar and they were all delighted. The elder then told Jackie he couldn’t see very well so she gave him some old glasses and he was thrilled. He signalled that we could take his picture and stood upright, spectators positioned a distance from the villagers but we managed to get them all in.

We reached Ouaga just before 12 and it was chaos with mopeds and bikes in all directions. Couldn’t find the campsite and eventually stopped a white man (who turned out to be from the British Consulate) for directions. Before finding it we found a lovely hotel with piscine! Had a drink then decided to return that evening for a swim and dinner.

The campsite was in the middle of a slum area but inside was quite nice, tree lined with a bar and pet monkey that was most affectionate until it got tangled in his lead and bit Garry as he tried to free him.

The swim was bliss and after the dinner was equally nice - I had melon, steak then chocolate profiteroles and cream.

Left our travelling companions after exchanging contact addresses and agreeing, if possible, to meet up again to go through Nigeria. They left the campsite about 2 hours before us. We then went to find a bank and spent a hot frustrating hour finding out that the 2 banks in Ouaga don’t change traveller’s cheques.

Finally left town at about 12.30 to go to Bobo. The road was good tarmac all the way. It was a very humid day and so decided it cooler to eat and prepare lunch whilst driving.

As it’s getting late, decided to try to camp before reaching Bobo. There were so many police checks it felt like we were out of the car more times than in. It was so heavily populated that every endeavour to pull off the road to camp led us to villagers. We decided to head to the centre of Bobo hoping to find a campsite. In the distance we saw Des Res and Lady Jackie poodling along but managed not to catch them up.

Exhausted we reached Bobo and it was now dusk and alive with cooking fires and music. We stopped at a nice open air bar and found out that there was no campsite, so ended up staying in a hotel that was quite basic but it was bliss to shower and sleep with the air conditioning on maximum.

Although we were in the cool air conditioned room I woke really early about 6 and read till Garry woke when we had a lovely breakfast of fresh croissants, butter, jam and coffee. Left the hotel and found a post office, bank and then wandered around the huge market that was divided into different sections - meat, cloth, artisan work, spices etc. We haggled for some flip-flops for me and got them for less than £1. Bought some cigs and lovely plum tomatoes then left this lovely town of Bobo at about 2.

The road was very hard going and not populated very much.

After the numerous police checks in Burkinos, when we arrived in Mali the customs men merely stamped our carnet and showed us through.

We saw a man-made forest and camped behind it. When we got out we heard rushing water and went to investigate thick into the trees. As we walked we disturbed many colourful birds and butterflies. We found a beautiful river rushing over some rocks but as it was infested with mosquitoes left quickly.

As we walked back to Rover I disturbed a bird like a Cuckoo but with fine ???? with feathers on the end coming from its wings. I hadn’t seen anything like it before even on the most exotic nature documentary. To prove I wasn’t seeing things we tracked it and Garry saw it too.

Set off from the idyllic forest setting quite late, feeling clean and refreshed and drove along the rough mud track that at times was just a dried river bed.

Stopped at the police check to see the only policeman lying down outside his mud hut with women and children around him. He asked us our names and then let us go with a cheery goodbye without even checking if we had visas, we decided we like Mali. Everyone waved as we passed through their tiny villages. Stopped on a pretty bridge for lunch but with so many insects around didn’t hand around.

Garry saw a deroun monkey run in front of us and a little later on I watched in amazement as a grey large monkey ran the whole field next to the car. Just as we thought all animals were kept in zoos!

Going was very slow and we only did 280K all day non stop for 8 hours. Even the last stretch of tarmac was a patchwork quilt of repairs and very bumpy.

After such a drive the map said a small village of Yan Folila had an equipped campsite and we were amazed to find this to be true. There was no running water or electricity but it was a clean shady site. After giving Anadin and Optrex to the police officer we were escorted by the duane to the campsite and settled down to a quiet evening, when, would you believe a Bose 1000W amplifier blared out and all the village turned out. It was so loud the cotton wool ear plugs didn’t help. Nothing will amaze me after that.

Had quite a lay in and got up at 8. Although this was one of the most out of the way villages we had camped in and that people could walk straight in no one bothered. The whole time we were there no one asked for anything but courtesy. The campsite was in front of the kindergarten and lovely smiling faces dared each other to greet us. Once they realised we didn’t bite they dared to shake our hands and eventually the cheeky ones stroked my hair and touched my face. We gave the teacher some pens and a pad of paper and he then invited us to see them in class. They were very well behaved. We left, after exchanging names and addresses with the teacher and campsite owner at about 12. At the friendly Mali border officials assured us there would be no problem with visas for Guinea, how wrong they were! We saw the Duanes first and before stamping our carnet we told him our problem he said it would be OK and insisted we change some money as there is no bank before the ferry crossing. We caused havoc at the police post when they realised we had no visa and we realised then that this wasn’t as friendly as Mali. After a lot of explaining and gentle persuasion, they let us go on to the next town with a letter to help us get a visa to be carried by the policemen’s two wives and 2 babies. 10 minutes up the road one woman was sick! The babies were so good considering conditions. At the “push-me-pull-me” ferry we waited for 3 hours for them to load and unload, we eventually crossed in the dark and then were promptly stopped by 2 very drunk Duanes who confiscated our carnet and made us sleep there the night and our ladies sleep in their hut!

We were woken up by the voices of our 2 femmes and the duanes discussing our situation loudly. Crawled out of bed bleary eyed and didn’t even have time or privacy for a wee, cuppa or wash. The customs guy declared that it wasn’t a car, but a bed and immediately let us goes - returning our beloved carnet. A little further on we found the police station with officers lazing around everywhere. There was much hoohay and discussion and finally it was declared that we couldn’t get our visa and would have to return to Bamako Mali for it - 200K away along the most treacherous roads we had come across. We waited another hour for our passports and letter then the policeman returned and said he would come back to Bodogo with us to try and get a visa there. Being a 2nd class citizen I had to sit in the back and hand on from grid death.

Once over the ferry again (this time the cost was only a ¼ bottle of old white wine) we arrived at the border to be told that we could have no visa! They refused to stamp our carnet and we would have to go to Bamako. Once at Yanfolilia chatted to the friendly officers in this sleepy town and picked up a Jamaican hitchhiker called Norman. This town held nothing but surprises for us. He had sold a Peugeot in Mali and travelled as far as Sierra Leone before making his way to Holland. A typical laid-back Jamaican we had a pleasant afternoon with him before dropping him off at Bougouni. We camped about 15K out of town surrounded by trees.

We woke up soaking wet with the sun beating down on the van. It was a lovely picturesque spot and after we packed away I took some photos of the strangest of rock (or termite hill) formations that look like giant toadstools. A woman walked up to us from the woods but took no notice of the strange visitors.

Drove to Bamako on the pot-holed tarmac road and arrived at about 1pm. Bought some bread from a street stall and then searched for the camping. We had been old there were 2 hotels that had campements but everyone we asked had never head of them. Eventually found the Hotel Lido that was supposed to do camping but it was a posh hotel packed with Europeans with a lovely swimming pool. Had a drink by the pool and were told that they do not do camping. Filled up with water at a garage and caused quite a stir with this unusual request. By this time Garry’s nerves were frazzled and the hour long search for camping proved fruitless. We were just about to give in and spend the night in the Hotel Lido when we saw a tourist route to the mountains. We camped by the side of the road with a panoramic view over the town. It was a lovely cool evening, free from mossies and we sat out till quite late soaking in the atmosphere of this relaxed capital city. There was a village near by but the people didn’t stop and stare at the gypsies by the roadside.

Got up early and went for coffee and croissants at a very swish hotel. Tried to ring the British consulate but there was no reply so the hotel receptionist gave us directions to the Guinea Embassy.

We were confronted with a room full of people at the Embassy and tried with little success to explain our problem - this served as entertainment for the waiting room until a Venezuelan young man came to our rescue to translate it into french. The receptionist still saw no problem as she said we were out of the country so that was our problem solved! We waited around and chatted to this most informative guy who explained our plight to the consulate when our turn finally came round. His answer to get a visa and return to Guinea for the stamp (this would cost about £50) so we decided to wait until we reached the Ivory Coast and sort it out there.

We met Juan and his friends Thomas (American) and German girl at the Catholic nunnery where they were staying and invited them to the mountains to enjoy the view. Before going we went back to the Hotel Amity to ring Ken as we received a telex asking us to ring that evening. After 30 seconds the line was cut off but we still had to pay £18. Ken rang us back and we had a good chat and found there was no problems at home - relief! Stayed in the mountains with Juan and Thomas and they educated us on culture and history of the Africans. Cooked a meal and shared a good drink and smoke over the city until 12 (pumpkin time) when we drove them home. They live in Berlin and they gave us their address and that of an Indian friend in Kenya who would make us welcome.

Were totally paranoid about noises outside all night and didn’t sleep well at all. After queuing in the bank for an hour (or rather pushing) it was more like a market stall - I changed the last of our travellers cheques and outside Garry had met a guy who would change them for a better rate.

We set off for Sikasso over the bumpy road and passed many villages on the way. It had been our intention to drive just past the town and camp for the night but upon driving through this town Garry spotted a small hotel to stop for a well needed drink. The hotel was empty and the manager devoted all his attention to us but being “tres fatigue” all linguistic skills failed us and we sat smiling like mute idiots. This was the 2nd day of Ramadan, despite this they cooked us dinner of roast chicken, frits and peas. Although the time they took to cook it made us think they had to find a roaming chicken and pluck it, we really enjoyed it. The manager agreed to let us stay in the car park free of charge! After a few cakes we retired to bed quite early while the noises from the hotel got louder on western pop. At 2am I woke with a start to hear someone outside rattling the Jerry cans. I woke Garry and he pulled back the curtains quickly and began to shout at the attacker. It was the guardian who had decided in his wisdom to wash the Rover. I’m not sure who was the most surprised - he definitely didn’t know we were in there!

Had a wholesome cheap breakfast in the hotel and then sat outside while the other side of the van was washed. We paid the guardian for his services but short of supplying the manager with cigs all night, didn’t tip him so he totally ignored us as we bid farewell.

Drove through the Mali/Ivory Coast border with ease. The difference in the Ivorians became apparent immediately and they were most efficient. We were amazed to see a smashed up lorry being driven across the border with the only access being through the space for the windscreen. After 100Kms the road changed to smooth tarmac and we made quick progress. Our map indicated that there was a campsite at one small town but the Africans were not going to let us find it easily - so after driving into a huge pot-hole we left town to the next town that indicated camping. This proved to be a game of hide and seek and as we drove out of town we stopped at a pretty open air thatched café to enquire. The manager told us we had found it and after a drink he would take us. Unfortunately Garry reversed into his outside lights but he seemed not in the least bothered and refused payment. He took us to a large house and we parked Rover in a garage and he showed us to our room! This was only the same cost as camping so we stayed. There was a houseboy and even the ladies staying in the next room offered to do my washing - I refused, appalled at being given superior treatment, I felt a pang of sadness for them. Had a lovely meal at the café.

During the night we heard what can only be described as ???? dances outside our window and from the other direction men’s voices could be heard from the next room. It made us wonder what the occupation of these 3 women who had been introduced as the wives of the bar owner! This pretty town was very clean with a french feel about the buildings. We went to the Post Office to ring Abijan and spring our imminent arrival on them. After waiting at least 15 minutes to be connected in true African style the line was cut off after 30 seconds leaving us in mid-sentence with John Hodson. Anyway he told us to meet him at the Hotel Ivoire so we set off on excellent roads to this capital.

The scenery changed dramatically to dense forest each side of the road and there was evidence everywhere of the way it was being used. Apparently Ivory Coast is the largest exporter of wood in Africa. There was a stark contrast between the traditional Africa and its modern westerners competing for space. This was far more apparent in Yassoukeran (the Adrien Capital) a brand new city, sparse of people. As we approached, the skyscrapers in the background, one African was trying to herd his cattle across the motorway. We eventually found the Hotel and John & Claire arrived to show us their house. They are so young and I think we will get on well with them. They took us to a lovely French restaurant for dinner (that cost a fortune) and we were stunned by the culture shock of arriving in this cosmopolitan city with every possible mod-con available, at a price!

We woke early. After a cold night where Garry kept trying to turn off the Air conditioning unit. Yoseph, the house-boy made us breakfast and I just couldn’t come to terms with this colonial lifestyle. We pottered about the house, feeling like spare parts until John came home for lunch and we sat down to a roast dinner! This was all so amazing and surely wrong! I’ve still not come to any firm opinion on that one. That afternoon we went back to John’s office with him in Rover and the garage had a look at it with a view to servicing it. It was decided we would take it in on Monday for a medical check-up.

At 7pm we had the treat of speaking to Ken, Sylv, Lindsay and Dad and Pam all at the same time on a loud speaker. Very confusing, but lovely to hear from them and catch up on their lives. We then went to a cocktail party and met some interesting, if a little pompous people. Johns’ family is huge (7 children) and I think we’ve met most of them now except the little ones. After drinks we went to a bar to meet Chris and April and there was a whole crowd of their friends there. Stayed a couple of hours and got pretty tipsy. From there we went to a Jazz Club that was packed with french enjoying themselves. You really do have to have a mint to be able to paint the town red here. The extravagance stung my conscience with Africa’s poverty still fresh in my mind. We climbed into bed at 2 in the morning.

Got up at 8.30 and Claire was busy preparing pizzas with Yoseph for the schools fete. John went into the office in the morning. At 10am Mum rang and we had a good chat. Everything seems the same for her unfortunately.

We went to meet Jacques for lunch but it didn’t turn out as expected and he left after about ½ hour - although he seemed pleasant to see us, the language barrier was too wide and John’s father didn’t turn up.

We spent most of the day watching videos then at about 4.30 we went down to the school to see Claire. By the time we arrived most of the pizzas were sold and loud American kids were romping around with an air of superiority. The boys left after an hour or so but as I was helping on the stall I stayed till the end with Claire.

They took us to an outside Vietnamese restaurant on the university campus for dinner. It was absolutely delicious and incredibly fast and cheap. We had a good evening with them.

Got up by Claire waking us with a tray of tea at 7.30! and by 8.15 we were on the golf course. As I had never played before I opted out of the first 9 holes plus it cost about £17 to play. But by the end of the first 9 holes I realised they too were novices so I joined in for the final 9, sod the expense. Garry played really well and considering this was my first attempt so do I. In fact my 1st drive was good enough to merit applause from the nearby caddy. This gave me the confidence I needed to continue. Its bloody hard work enjoying yourself at this sport here, as the heat is incredible and the clubs are bloody heavy. Anyway, I thoroughly enjoyed it and we all got very sunburnt. 18 holes and a few drinks lasted us all day and when we got home at 4 we crashed out in front of the video for the rest of the day.

Claire and John went to bed early and as we were about to, Robert, John’s black-sheep brother came round and gave us the fright of our lives, we thought he was a burglar.

As soon as we got up we rang John and he sent a driver round to show us to the office. We took Rover in for his service and John kindly sent us the company’s spare care. It was Garry’s first experience of driving a left hand drive in a crazy country with a Mazda that had a mad steering system. Anyway we managed to go to town to the bank and back to the house in one piece and without getting lost.

Claire came home from work early, supposedly sick and she took us to buy shoes. As everything is at least twice the price as England I bought a pair of Baton pumps and Garry some canvas trainers.

From there we had a quick look in the maze of the market and then to the material shop - an Aladdin’s cave of exotic prints. Garry bought some cream cotton to have a pair of trousers made up. I went to Aerobics with Claire and April.

We were going out for crepes but it was closed so ended up going to a lovely restaurant and ate outside overlooking the lagoon. While we ate our king prawns they showed us how to play the French game of Yams. Another good evening.

In the morning Garry and I went to the Amex office but they would only let us have £500 - every 21 days. That amount would only last a week here.

After lunch we went back to the garage with John but Landy still wasn’t ready so we went to the beach with Claire and Mackintosh. What a jewel of a place. The Atlantic is lovely and warm but the waves come crashing in and its so dangerous to swim! There wasn’t a soul in site on the sprawling sand - which is lined with coconut palms. After walking up the shore line we went for a drink in the beach bar which is Ken’s Sunday haunt. The Africans have the right ideas as they have built their shacks all along the coast - with scenery and built-in air conditioning like that who needs a big modern house!

After Aerobics (which killed me) we went to Mark and Natalie’s flat. They’ve got a gorgeous 18 months old baby girl. Bob, Robert and friend, Kieran and Thomas were there with a mountain of pizza. We all played Yams until quite late then Kieran started off a discussion about the situation in Africa which got quite heated. Bob after a few too many verbally attacked Thomas, who coped quite well with the insults.

I didn’t get up until 10.30 and still felt tired - its worrying that even with the air conditioning I still feel hot and had a bout of African tummy. We didn’t do anything all morning except fill out about 20 visa applications. John had kindly arranged for his driver to take them to the embassies for us.

After lunch of steak, chips and quiche, we set about cleaning out Rover. John lent us the spare bungalow for us to spread out our dusty belongings. We stripped off all the covers and curtains and totally emptied it which left us literally dripping with perspiration.

Claire and I were going to go to aerobics but April came round and it didn’t take much persuasion for us to change our minds. Instead we flopped in front of the telly and watched Thunderbirds while eating a great leftovers supper and playing Yams, which I still haven’t got the hang of. John and Claire went to bed early and we stayed up chatting to April until Chris turned up to collect her at 11.30. He had put on a hair demonstration which didn’t go too well and was well cheesed off.

Didn’t do much all day. We started washing the seat covers and are trying to get Rover together again so its ready to go to the beach on Sunday.

Claire and I went to aerobics again, what a fitness fanatic I’m becoming, not really, cos I ache all the time but it must be doing some good. It was hard work today cos it was all leg exercises and we used the bar and blocks of wood to torture ourselves.

We came straight back to the house to get changed for squash. I thoroughly enjoyed it as Claire, Kieran and Hella (a Danish plump girl, who was very nice to talk to but very conscious of her size) couldn’t play properly and we just knocked the ball.

When we got back Garry and John were watching telly and Claire cooked us some pizza.

When we got up at 9, the driver told us that Ken would be ringing during the morning so we had to stay in. We started cleaning Rover out inside until lunchtime when we dropped in for dinner.

After lunch Yoseph’s family range to say his baby boy was ill, so Garry rushed him off. Garry returned after taking him to hospital and was shocked to find what state the place was in - Yoseph had to bribe the desk to let him in with a pack of cigs and his baby was sharing a bed, although the hospital seemed sterile nobody was doing anything for the child except give blood and his condition was critical. We received a call from Yoseph after an hour saying he had died. Claire and Garry had to tell Yosephs brother and then they went to his house to see if there was anything they could do to help. They weren’t surprised he had caught some disease, as his house was next to an open sewer although his house was immaculate. Everyone was obviously very upset there but John annoyed me by taking a very callous attitude - it was only his “house-boys” child. Claire went out on the town for the evening with April and didn’t get home until 7 - we stayed in with John and watched more videos but I couldn’t stop thinking about the unjust situation Yoseph was in.

We set off early in search of a hotel that would change some money - as we missed the banks the previous day helping Yoseph. The second hotel we went to obliged with a bit of gentle persuasion.

Claire had a lie-in and then after having a hamburger we went to play golf - oh how the rich live! I was pleased with my 9-hole round of 85 and Garry’s was even more impressive with 63. Darkness stopped play.

We got home at 7 and had time to shower and change for dinner. It was our thank you dinner for John and Claire’s hospitality and we went to Chez-Surios and ate like kings. Then paid a kings ransom and were thankful to our flexible friend.

Garry was ill in the night but I put it down to the rich food.